Going to Japan? Amy's Guide to Best Behavior in Japan is an unfussy modern guide that guarantees you keep it polite and get it right!
This illustrated guide to common courtesy, acceptable behavior, and manners is essential for any visitor to Japan. By knowing how to act in every situation you'll gain the respect of your hosts and in the end get even better service and enjoyment during your travels.
Covered here are all the essentials—like travel, greetings, dining—plus subtle niceties like tone of voice, body language, cell phone usage, city vs. country styles, and attire (and what to do about your tattoos!).
Amy's Guide to Best Behavior in Japan by Amy Chavez, illustrated by Jun Hazuki is available in both print and digital everywhere now. Order your copy here.
Read a sample of Amy's Guide below.
1 Out and About
This first chapter will help you understand the basics of behavior in Japan and of interacting with Japanese people.
Some Basic Pointers
Let’s start with some common-sense guidelines that apply pretty much anytime and anywhere during your travels in Japan. The first rule of being polite is to avoid causing trouble and to not inconvenience your hosts!
Be sensitive to those around you and refrain from sighing, grunting, or other unpleasant verbal idiosyncrasies.
Try not to take up more space than necessary in public, such as sitting with legs spilling over into the next seat.
When standing in crowds, be careful to not swing around and belt people with your backpack or draw attention to yourself by practicing your baseball pitch if you’re bored.
Pack wisely and compactly so you won’t be schlepping too much baggage onto trains or clogging the vomitories at train stations.
If you have heaps of luggage, do what the Japanese do and send it ahead to your next destination with one of the popular luggage-forwarding services.
If you are part of a large group, monitor the noise level of the group and remind people when they’re getting too loud and starting to attract attention.
Do not gesticulate while talking or stand like a tough guy with legs apart and arms akimbo (save it for karate class).
Refrain from leaning against walls or pillars, especially while talking to someone. You are not James Dean.
It is uncivilized for children to jump up and sit on railings or walls.
No horsing around: I once saw a tourist grab two subway straps and do a gymnastic flip in the aisle. While I’m not sure he is the only foreigner to have ever done this, I’m sure there is no Japanese person who ever has.
Teasing, winking, shrugging your shoulders, and rolling your eyes are nonverbal clues not used in Japanese daily life so are likely to cause confusion.
Try to be as controlled, put-together, and invisible as possible (hey, just like the natives!).
Never openly flaunt the rules just because you don’t agree with them.
When in doubt . . . apologize. In Japan, people apologize even when they are not at fault. It’s just their way of saying that they regret there was some inconvenience or misunderstanding. Apologizing shows maturity.
Smoking in Public
Although fewer people smoke these days, tobacco culture is still strong in Japan. The ultimate decision is left to individual establishments as to whether or not to ban smoking on their premises. There are, in contrast, signs outdoors reminding people not to smoke while walking as their trail of smoke may inconvenience those behind them. You will see cigarette vending machines, but you may need a “smart card” to access them. Smoking laws in Japan are constantly changing and are expected to become stricter. Check the latest online before you arrive.
While all public buildings are smoke-free, some restaurants and cafes still have “smoking sections.” Many izakaya (Japanese-style restaurant pubs), bars, and hostess clubs allow smoking.
Puffing away outdoors in public places is frowned upon these days, but locations such as train station platforms will have designated smoking areas, sometimes called “smoking corners.” Do not light up at a bus stop or any public place that doesn’t have a designated smoking area.
Large train stations have windowed “smoking rooms” with exhaust fans inside them.
Smoking is illegal on some city streets while others may merely have “No Smoking Zones.”
Some Japanese carry their own portable ashtray so as not to flick ashes on the ground and to safely and properly stash their butts.
When with others ask if it’s okay to smoke in front of them.
If there are no ashtrays, assume you cannot smoke.
Try not to use an empty drink can as an ashtray as these containers must be rinsed out before being thrown away with the recyclables.
Forbidden Things
Don’t even think about doing drugs of any kind in Japan. Marijuana, now legal in several U.S. states, is not tolerated and several famous personalities (notably Paul McCartney) have been denied entry into Japan due to a history of drug convictions. Even Japanese celebrities caught with illegal substances inside Japan invariably lose their contracts and are pressured to appear on TV to apologize to their fans for disappointing them and for failing to be good role models.
Some other legal medications (such as some opioids) are banned in Japan; be sure to check the immigration website if you are planning to bring prescription drugs into the country.
It is illegal to carry any type of weapon, including guns, swords, and knives. Pocket knives are okay, but any blade longer than 6 cm (2.4 inches) can legally be considered a weapon.
Pornography showing unpixelated genitals is illegal in Japan and penalties are severe. Be sure to tidy up your laptop and don’t bring foreign porn mags into Japan.
What to Wear (or Not)
Japan is hot and humid in summertime. Be prepared! When going out of doors, the basic rule of thumb is: Always dress a tad more formally or conservatively than you would at home.
If invited out by a Japanese person, dress well. You are bound to be taken to a nice place (maybe even a restaurant where they know the owner or chef) and dressing down may embarrass your host. If the restaurant is anything but a casual izakaya, wear something nicer than jeans ‘n’ sneakers or a sundress.
Consider carrying a face cloth or handkerchief to wipe sweat off your face (or a hand-towel draped around your neck). Never use your sleeve or shirttail. Slobbery is frowned upon. If you find your shirt is getting drenched with sweat due to Japan’s high humidity, either carry a spare dry shirt to change into or do like the Japanese and wear an undershirt beneath your regular shirt to soak up the moisture.
Don’t offend people with your B.O. Perfume or cologne can be considered equally offensive. Use antiperspirant or deodorant. Your goal is to be as unfragrant as possible.
If you are a man with long hair, keep it gathered into a pony tail at all times.
Men should avoid wearing tank tops at all costs (hairy armpits—yuck!).
Men, no plumber’s crack.
Women, always wear a brassiere.
Sexy is okay, but only for the young and brazen. Older women should dress more conservatively. Women of all ages, mind your cleavage.
Jeans with holes in them are okay in the city but are frowned upon in the (more conservative) countryside. If you must wear jeans with holes, make sure they are designer holes. No ripped jeans, even in the city. You just don’t see sloppy, unkempt people in Japan.
Shorts are for kids. Japanese adults seldom wear shorts and certainly not in the city. This doesn’t mean you can’t wear shorts, it just means you’ll be the only one donning them. Over forty years old? Opt for longer shorts that go down to, or past, the knee.
Everything in its proper place: Tennis shorts only on the tennis court please. Ditto for running or work-out clothing.
At the beach, eschew butt-revealing thongs. Donning high heels while wearing a bikini, however, seems to be de rigueur.
No nude sunbathing. And absolutely no skinny dipping, even when you think no one is looking.
If someone seemingly good-humoredly points out your worn jeans, your bare feet, or your shirt unbuttoned down to your navel exposing your hairy chest, it probably means you are doing something wrong.
Amy's Guide to Best Behavior in Japan by Amy Chavez is available in both print and digital everywhere now. Order your copy here.